Review: The Body Farm

BBC One is teasing us with another new series this autumn before it eventually gives us what we want (what will happen to Dr Who? and when can we see Benedict Cumberbatch again?).

The Body Farm is a semi-resurrected 'Waking the Dead' which was officially pronounced dead last year (thankfully) but somehow in the multitude of BBC scripts Dr Eve Lockhart survived (played by Tara Fitzgerald). The episode began with a philosophical justification for the way Lockhart farms putrefying bodies full of maggots and worm, not simply content with the usual rant about justice, the audience is given the privilege of a monologue: “I have two promises that I vow to keep. My promise to the murderer is this: I will find you… To the victim I promise this: I will unlock the mechanism of your murder.” I must admit I giggled, but I can afford to risk wasting an hour, so let's see what happens next...

Introducing the characters was painfully cliché, we have the love interest/good looking cool dude, of course we need a weird genius with a mental problem (I hope he becomes the Hulk), and finally the way-over-the-top-sentimental feminist who's sole purpose is to feel for the victim, ignore the science and care about the human. Oh and there is plenty of multiculturalism! So much so I felt the BBC was begging the public not to criticize it's ethnic quota.

The show followed the typical crime plot, I thought there was too much feeling for a crime drama, I would have liked a bit more CSI New York, straight to the point without the wishy washy nonesense, maybe get a car chase? There was a moment when Lockhart asks for DNA swabs of a kid's parents to prove he was a victim, the dad steps forward and says (demands) that he will give one (what a hero!); then his wife nudges him and says no! (he retorts, why the hell not! he's my son!) She reminds him he's not the biological dad (he's still my son!).

Shit, bring on Jeremy Kyle. And that is how I felt watching Body Farm.