As a random act of writing madness, I'm going to share some gastronomic experiences of mine on planes. One particular item of what was meant to be edible 'food' stands out in the history of my hundreds of flights: a pink cube. What could it be?
As the tray was placed in front of me I immediately recognised the typical round bread (too hard for restaurants to serve but somewhat tasty with butter), the hot dish (chicken, green beans, a disconcertingly yellow mash), the knife and fork wrapped in plastic and surrounded by a peppering of salt bags (no pepper this time), and of course the pot of water (squeezed out of the purest volcano springs of France). Then I saw what could only be desert. Before touching, prodding and poking it I inspected it's shape; definitely a cube. Sitting on its little plate it rested, pink, the light reflecting dimly off it's surface. Was it gelatinous? No, just very smooth. I gave it a poke, not so hard as to disturb it from it place in the middle of the plate, but enough to feel the solidity of it's magnificently even shape. Not quite a mousse, too hard. But not a biscuit either. I inspected the other specimens on my row, the other pink curiosities were receiving the same treatment. One I saw was gulped up by a rather large man, he belched but seemed quite satisfied. I opened my cutlery and readied my fork, in Sherlock Holmes fashion I frowned as I went to give this food a prod. Interrupted. The steward asked if all was okay. 'Yes' i answered, but in a way that showed I had a question, 'what is this?'. He smiled condescendingly, 'chocolate'.
My second memorable experience with food was a late night flight from Montreal to Munich on Lufthansa. As if the seats in economy and the service weren't enough to praise this great airline, the meal was made me wonder if I was dreaming. I must stress at this point that my flight history includes some pretty horrific incidents, and people with more experience in business or first might not appreciate what I'm going to write.
I was sat against the window (my favorite seat) with an empty seat next to me. This was thanks to some clever rearranging by the stewardess who, with skill and expertise, politely moved 4 people around the cabin in order for me to get two seats to myself and for a young couple to sit comfortably with their newborn baby. The first shock was when the tray arrived, I prepared myself for disappointment (being British, this way I am rarely disappointed). I saw the bread (soft, made of clouds?), the hot dish (chicken, gravy, mashed potatoes, peas, carrots... and all the right colour!), dessert was a beautiful (and generous portion) black forest gateau, then the cutlery (metal, with a pattern!). Metal cutlery in economy? I've told many people this and apparently it's a common occurrence, bringing to mind that I've spent too long these past years flying on low budget airlines. My top airlines had been Air New Zealand, Air Jordan and Air Canada but my first experience with Lufthansa has changed my view of the world (somewhat). As if I wasn't happy enough, I was then offered wine, and spent the rest of the night with a great bottle of red. I didn't want to leave, but my trip had the sole purpose of getting from Montreal to Toulouse to propose to my girlfriend; it included a the Atlantic flight to Munich, a small business jet to London, the day walking around, an evening train to Paris, an overnight train to Toulouse and finally a car ride to my girlfriend's. The misery of the French train network couldn't dampen my spirits after that great flight. All this was followed by me proposing in an Italian restaurant overlooking a square in Toulouse at sunset; I had fettuccine with salmon and a glass of white wine, so not a bad day!
These are my two extremes of 'meals of planes' experiences; so now when I see a tray put in front of me on a plane I always think 'I've seen pink chocolate, whatever it is I won't be shocked.'
